Bedazzled! is always a good time, even if I'm not a good time.

Here's "Out of Sight" by James Brown and The Game People Play.

Man, I love my new Vista peapod unhosable bingbong trousers.

Review No. 7 is now online.

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TABLE #125

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crets eggs

Chris Abani & Peter Orner 02/01 @ The Poetry Center

Death March Begins

The Against the Day Deathmarch begins tomorrow, sponsored by Cecil Vortex. Beginning Tuesday, January 30, read 50 pages a day of Thomas Pynchon's Against the Day and blog about it. Finish it (I'm not sure what year that would be) and you could win marvelous prizes.

Full information here.

Dozens of Pynchonists the world over are already waiting to be your new friend.

NEW TINYSIDES FROM BIG GAMES BOOKS    GO ►►

Tuesday February 6th: Leslie Scalapino & Rae Armantrout @ Moe's

CLOSING NIGHT!

POETS THEATER JAMBOREE 2007
All seats $10 — no reservations — arrive early


FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 2, 2007 at 7:30 P.M.

“Hooligan’s Island,” / Written & Directed by Scott MacLeod

“Self/Cell” / Text by Olivia E. Sears / Images by Aline Mare / Music by Craig Bicknell

“The Deathperts” / Written & Directed by Chana Morgenstern

Selections from “James Joyce, Marcel Duchamp, Erik Satie: An Alphabet” (1982)
Written by John Cage / Directed by Marie Carbone / With Gillian Conoley, Patricia Dienstfrey, Dale Going, Brenda Hillman, Denise Liddell Lawson, Denise Newman, giovanni singleton and Carol Snow

“The Gunfight” / Written & Directed by Brent Cunningham

"FEED" / Written & directed by Juliana Spahr

"Noggin Flowers" / Written by Lisa Robertson & Jacob Eichert / Directed by Kevin Killian


MAP & DIRECTIONS

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I live in Oakland and am carless if anybody wants to trundle together.

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However I stumbled on this page (keine Ahnung), it made me a little homesick.

In the coming days I will be blogging about other things I miss, and then everything.

The 2008 Modern Poets Series, for a full-length collection by a poet writing in English at any stage in his or her career

• Envelope must be postmarked on or between February 1st of 2007 and February 28th of 2007. No Federal Express or UPS
• guidelines pdf

forthcoming

alice blue five

Samson W. Gave Me One Star

Samson W. posted a review of the place where I work on Yelp today and gave it one star.

I'm "the guy."

Because I always say something like, "sorry I can't use any of these today," and I always say the same things to people, and tell the same jokes, by "which suck big time," Samson W. must have meant it sucked that I couldn't buy any.

I feel terrible.

Before I learnt about this and felt terrible (I still feel terrible) I felt great because I was feeling great and fresh copies of Black Clock 6 had just come in.

leajous snet

sometimes i love the bus

A.M. Abraham Lincoln's Death Scene by Zachary Schomburg
P.M. Threads by Jill Magi

I am labeling all the online journals to read this weekend Hud.

A friend asked me tonight what's up with all the birthdays. Because I don't like to talk about my personal problems, I denied it. What birthdays. I read about birthdays on your blog. I tried really hard to think of something else to talk about. Do you want a stick of gum. I have gum. We chewed gum together awhile. We stood and watched a traffic light turn from green to amber to red and then green again.

We're good friends.

READING TONIGHT!
LINDA RUSSO & SARAH ANNE COX

Almost precisely here: that dread-told EYEBALL HATRED.

Yet white page at this writing: the TYPO 9.

Aiden Starr with Jon Leon, Laura Solomon, Jenny Boully, Jasper Bernes, Kirsten Kaschock, and Karla Kelsey.

Like a late baby, it's big.

onedit 7

It was very nearly Zachary Schomburg Afternoon at the store today. I received copies of Mr. Schomburg's new Horse Less Press chapbook, Abraham Lincoln's Death Scene, and a startling box from Octopus Books (hi, Mathias!). To tell you the truth, I trembled when I opened it. I was frightened. I held my boxcutter and had to rehearse my approach two or three times before first slicing. I think some kind of cgi golden sunburst shot out of the box when its flaps came open. I heard a flourish and a harp and big drums, although there were no trumpet players or harpists or drummers in the store at the time. A man with a harmonica put down the used volume of Thomas Hardy's poems he'd been fingering and stepped to the desk and asked me, "What's in that box?"

  chax press moment:

SINCE I MOVED IN
by Tim Peterson

TOMORROW NIGHT
LINDA RUSSO
7:30PM
MIRTH

Look out.

Coconut Seven

TONIGHT AT CITY LIGHTS:
SPD NEW LIT GENERATION
PARTY AND READING

with Ben Lerner, Dana Teen Lomax,
Aimee Suzara, Jay Thomas,
Indiana Pehlivanova, and Eric Foster


Poster says 7:30 PM.
City Lights' website
says 7. You decide.

JEREMIAH PALECEK'S VIDEOS.

HERETICAL TEXTS, VOLUME 3

asmith@dailyherald.com

In January 2006 I commented on an article online about cassette tapes. I wrote:

I think the only cassette I've got worth holding onto is the Replacements' The Shit Hits the Fans.

And it's horrible.

(The article is no longer online.)

A few days later I received the following email from an Andrew Smith:

Clay,

I just found out from Paul Stark at Twin/Tone that they're going to make available "The Sh*t Hits the Fans" from the Twin/Tone Web site in the fall. Unfortunately, I'm an old Replacements fan that was trying to compile all the older source material I didn't have from the Twin/Tone years so I could make a proper mix CD for an intern in our office who's in high school and plays guitar in a band. He said his band plays "alternative pop." He needs some help.

Anyway, I didn't want to wait until the fall to get the material, and I noticed you had a copy of the tape and that you thought it was horrible. As an old 'Mats fan, I was wondering if you'd be willing to part with your tape at all. If so, what amount would you be comfortable selling to me for?

Just curious,
Andrew Smith
near Chicago, Ill.

I replied:

if you can put it onto a disc, we can swap.

CLAY

And Andrew wrote:

Clay,

I'm not sure if I understand you correctly--are you saying you want me to put it onto a CD-R for you after you send it to me and send the disc back to you? If so, yes, I have the capability to burn it onto a music CD-R. I have a stereo-system component Harmon/Kardan CD player and recorder that has analog inputs in the back for vinyl album input, cassette tape input, etc.

Andrew

Me:

andrew,

i was writing in between things at work. i'm certain i wrote probably half-intelligibly.

yes, if you'll put it onto a CD for me, the cassette's yours.

clay

Our busy correspondence continued that day, January 26, 2006:

Clay,

As I mentioned, I have a very good high-end stereo system component Harman/Kardan CDR 26 that I can burn CDs with. I also use high-quality blank music CD-Rs made by IO Products. They are great because they have nothing printed on their topside so you can write whatever you want on the top with a CD-marking pen on your own and there's no printing or anything like that getting in the way. Or, if you put your own label on the top, you won't have any printing showing through the white label from underneath.

Here's my address. You might as well send me the cassette at work:

Andrew Smith
Daily Herald
4300 W. Commerce Ct. Ste. 100
Lisle, IL 60532

When I send you your CD-R back, I'll also have it in its own CD jewel case. If I can, I'll try to create some artwork for it for your trouble.

Sound like a plan?

Andrew

Oh, my phone number at work is: (630) 955-3514 if you need it for any reason.

My reply:

sounds great, perfect.

i'll be sending it out tomorrow or saturday, andrew.

clay banes

Andrew shot back quickly asking for my address, so he could send me the CD-R. I told him he'd get it with the cassette when it arrived, but I wrote him my address anyway.

On February 13, 2006, Andrew wrote:

Clay,
Received "The Sh*t Hits the Fans" tape. I'll need to get a tape player to hook up to my CD burner, so give me a couple of weeks.
Andrew

On March 26, 2006, I hadn't heard from Andrew Smith. So I wrote a quick hello asking what's up and told him to be in touch.

The next day Andrew replied:

Clay,
I'm well, all apologies for not getting your disc back to you yet. I ended up taking a three week vacation to Northern California, and then when I got back, I had election things at the newspaper making my life really hectic. I'm still working on getting a tape deck to burn your CD for you. Thanks for e-mailing though so I have your e-mail address fresh in my folder. I'll keep you posted.
Andrew

I replied that I'd lost track of time myself and had just remembered. No problem.

I wrote Andrew Smith again on May 20, 2006, and asked if he had forsaken me.

On May 26, 2006, Andrew replied:

Mike,
My apologies on my slow everything. I obtained an old tape deck with which I was going to burn your CD, and I found it wasn't working. I'm in the process of repairing it, and as soon as it's repaired, I'm going to burn your disc.
Andrew

I immediately responded:

clay here.

andrew, as long as i'm not forgotten, i'm fine waiting.

c.

And Andrew:

Oops, sorry.
Don't know where the heck Mike came from. Probably accidentally typed it because I have a friend named Mike.

I lost track again. I did not hear from Andrew Smith.

On September 15, 2006, I wrote:

dear andrew,

i'll try to remind you every three and half months.

clay

Andrew Smith did not respond. I wrote him again on November 2, 2006:

Happy November!

Again, he did not respond.

I have not heard from Andrew Smith.

I have not heard from Andrew Smith.